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Scott Elias

Thanks for posting this, Nancy. I think I just got off the phone with that parent before I read your post.

I don't think I've ever seen a situation that was 100/0 or even 90/10. Most of the time it's pretty darn close to a 50/50 sharing of responsibility (or irresponsibility as the case may be).

Occasionally I can get a student to cop to the truth. I just keep repeating, "So even though you two have hated each other since the second grade, fought with each other two Saturdays ago, and have been in love with the same guy since October, you were just minding your own business -- not looking at her or talking to her -- and she just walked over and started pounding on you out of the blue? Wow. That's just awful!"

Your mileage may vary.

-- Scott

Matt Hillmann


Excellent post! I think it is important to begin the conversation -- make a phone call home before the students gets to state their "side" of the story.

I finished Dr. Walsh's book a couple of weeks ago and I recommend it to anyone who works with or has kids. It is chock full of practical advice and good old fashioned common sense.

Crystal F

As the parent of two young boys, I'm trying hard not to squelch the natural desire to do things for themselves. They are born with it, and somehow, parents deny them of it, and make them lazy. I agree with what you say about sheltering them from disappointment, and I often find I have to fight with myself, so my child can learn that in life there are consequences, and we have to learn how to deal with them.

Brad Davis

I have often run into the scenario in which the student claims to me that he or she did the act and the appropriate punishment was given and we all thought that is was over and done with... until the kid got home that is and then the story changed a bit. Even if I have the student write everything he or she tell me down (which also takes a lot of time) he or she still get mom and dad to believe the new story. It turns out that he was under too much mental duress to answer my questions properly. (this just happened yesterday)

They need to include a finger print detection class for new administrators.

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