Humility

Entries influencing this post:
Steve Dembo's Twitter-ed messages.
Patrick Higgins: I like this direction.
Ben Wilkoff's The Ripe Environment
David Warlick's It Isn't Easy

Coming off of the National Educational Computing Conference, there's some discussion about how the education bloggers have to be careful of becoming egotistical -- and not become enamored both with our own ideas and our sense of being ahead of the curve. I was an English teacher. I've read Oedipus with kids. So I agree. I think that it's easy for folks right now to fall into a place that creates a sense of impatience because "other folks" haven't grasped onto the need for change.

I think the danger in that is that it could create a syndrome as bad as the "yeah, buts." It could create the "if only's." "If only everyone else understood what I see, then we'd have the schools we need."

That's poison.

Humility is something I think about a lot, probably because of my fear of becoming an arrogant bastard. It's one of my goals every year and every day to try to keep myself grounded and to never get too enamored with my own ideas. This year was actually pretty easy to stay humble because any time I got a little full of myself over what was going on at SLA, I seemed leaving school to go to CHOP to visit Theo in the hospital or waiting for another doctor's report. Nothing is more humbling than seeing your baby in a surgical recovery room or taking him to the ER at 2:00 am.

However, I don't recommend that to anyone as a way to keep yourself grounded. In fact, I feel comfortable saying that there probably is a better way. ;)

With that...

It's easy to get lost in the headiness of new things... starting SLA, for example. But I really feel that egotism is antithetical to a reflective culture, so I really try to work hard to not get carried away with myself. Here are some things I try to do or think about to stay grounded in the work that needs to get done.

1) Take our ideas serious, but don't take ourselves seriously. I'm still the same moron that nearly killed himself in high school because he and his friends thought it would funny to see how cherries we could stuff into our mouths at one time. So while I try to think deeply about issues I care about, I try to be a both passionate speaker and listener, and I try to care deeply about the things I do, I can never quite take myself seriously. That's important.

2) Listen for points of commonality and growth, not contention. Ever been in one of those conversations where you realize that the other person is just listening to you for the moment when they can find something wrong with what you are saying? That person's not learning from you. Let's make sure that in our passion to communicate our ideas for new schools, that we don't become that guy. It's the difference between arguing to learn and arguing to win. You can take it even one step further...

3) When we are in conversations with those we may disagree with or with someone we want to have we see our point, put our own point aside for a while, and listen simply to what they have to say. Ask questions about their point. Ask them to elaborate or clarify and truly listen for understanding. At worst, we have a better understanding of their position, and at best, we gain an understanding of how we have to change or grow our own position.

4) Question ourselves. This is part of my whole "What is the worst consequence of your best idea?" mantra. It's partially so you can plan and mitigate, but it's also so that we never forget that nothing is a panacea, and that no idea comes from us fully formed and perfect.

5) Recognize that we stand on the shoudlers of giants. This is yet another reason why we have to ground our work in the words and works of those who have come before us. Their words should inspire and ground us and make us remember and understand that our voices, our actions, our schools are part of the long experiment of public education in this country.

6) Keep the ideal in mind, and keep examining the real. Be honest and open with yourself about where you are, where you want to be, and how hard the road is to get there. I take what I think is a justifiable sense of pride in where SLA is, but I also know that if this is where we are five years from now, we'll have failed.

7) Ask ourselves "What's good?" as opposed to "What's new?" New is easy, good is hard. Challenging ourselves to ask and answer the hard questions as opposed to the easy ones is a humbling experience as the answers are often a lot more elusive.

8) Don't write posts about how to stay humble without being powerful cognizant and aware that that, in and of itself, is an exercise in hubris. Oh well.

And I do hate the way this post reads because of that last one, and I've debated posting this at all, but because Steve Dembo's challenge to us resonated so deeply, and because the line between passionate and righteous is a dangerous one -- and one I've struggled with, I thought I'd post it.

I also have to end with this... Simon cited one of my favorite quotes in a comment on David's entry: 

Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it’s the only thing that ever has.

I do think that the educators in my aggregator can change the world. But I think we all have to understand that a) change is slower than we'd want, and b) to change the world, we have to be as close to the ideal versions of ourselves as we can. We have to be passionate and dedicated and smart and inclusive and tireless and humble. We have to be better tomorrow at being who we are than we are today. Our ideas and work can change the world and make a difference, but only if we are willing to constantly change ourselves.

And if the enormity of that task that doesn't humble us, nothing will.

Comments

[Mike Waiksnis]

Great post. This may border on ways to stay humble, but this works for me:

Truly listen to ideas of others. If one of your teachers wants to try something, let them. Even if it something you do not think is necessary, encourage them to try it. (Of course, unless it is something that is not good for kids, etc...) I try every day to build leaders and we have to encourage them to lead!

[Kelly Christopherson]

Listening more than talking is one of the greatest things we can do as leaders and one of the hardest. As we learn and develop this skill, many of the other things that you describe also develop and we become much better at seeing things in a larger frame than what is just before us.
Thanks for the reminder to focus beyond myself and remember that humility is a strength and not a weakness!